Friday, January 27, 2012

Well, I did it...

I got on the scale today.

Now you know why you felt the earth shake.

After much crying, wailing, and gnashing of teeth, I have pulled up my big(ger) girl panties and have made a decision.

I am tired of being fat.

Four(ish) years ago I lost (get ready for it) SEVENTY-FIVE pounds.  Yes.  I lost the equivalent of a small person.  Since then I have gained all but about about 7 pounds of it back.

I am ashamed to admit that.

I feel disgusting.

I feel like a sausage in my clothes.

I refuse to buy a bigger size pants....again.

I am almost forty and I feel like I have the body of an eighty year old.  My feet hurt, my knees are starting to hurt, and I am all out of breath walking up the FOUR stairs to my house.

Enough

is

ENOUGH.

I'm not going to say that I did it for all the wrong reasons last time, although I do think some of the reasons were wrong.  I have to get this under control, though, or I may not make it to fifty.  Which we are not going to talk about because forty is hard enough for me to deal with.  Which is to say, I am not dealing with it.

Denial, table for one, please.

So.

No more donuts.  No more bagels.  No more cake, brownies, or cupcakes.  And...No.More.Ice.Cream.

gulp

I CAN do this, though.  I know that I can.  I am not setting any outrageous, "I am going to lose fifty pounds by April 1" kind of goals, though, because I know how I can be about what I consider failure.  I do hope to lose at least ten pounds by my birthday and then (hopefully) another ten by the end of the school year.  I remember how good I felt four summers ago when I could wear cute summer clothes and I know how awful I feel right now.  I hate myself and I hate looking in the mirror.  I have never liked getting my picture taken and now it is even worse.  I hide from the camera as much as I can because I am ashamed that I let myself get like this again.

There is a thinner me inside of this person and she is going to escape.  And this time she is going to stay.

Tuesday, January 24, 2012

What will they say next....

Heard recently from the mouths of my students:

  • "You know, Miss Olsen, when I first met you (a year ago), I thought you were only in your twenties...even with all that gray hair."
  • "Will you all please be quiet!  She is trying to make a pronouncement."
  • "Miss Olsen!  You are wearing (with an audible gasp) MAKE-UP.  Everybody!  She must have a date!  She has MAKE-UP on!"
  • "He had one too many circumcisions."  (Please, please don't ask me where that came from or what it was in reference to.  I couldn't even begin to tell you.)
  • (When they found out I am taking a day off in March)  "WHAT?!?  You can't leave us!  No one understands us like you do!"
  • (On my plans for next year)  "No arguing.  You will be our teacher next year.  We can't not be your kids anymore.  Besides.  You know you don't want those third graders."  (They speak the truth on that one.)
  • "I think I might cry at the end of this year.  I didn't last year but I am pretty sure I will this year.  Will you cry, Miss Olsen?  Will you cry when we leave you for the summer?  You will cry, right?"
Sweet Lord.

What will they say next?!?

Saturday, January 21, 2012

Let it snow...

I mean, melt.

Ugh.

I woke up this morning to an inch or so of snow and ice.

Ugh.

I shouldn't complain because it could have been worse and I could have to go out in it but, still...

Ugh.

Needless to say, miss raven and I will be snuggling at home ALL DAY TODAY.  The electric throw is on, the Cowboys blankie is over top of it, the coffee is hot, the space heater is doing it's thing.  The candles are lit, the dryer is working, and there is a House marathon on.

I feel somewhat like this is a wasted snow.  I mean, really.  Couldn't it have come late Sunday night/early Monday morning?

Just sayin.

;)

Tuesday, January 17, 2012

Let us all rejoice...

for the tree is down!

I know, finally...right?

Although it did warm my heart to know that I am not the only person out there who still had a Christmas tree standing....

:)

This week is Spirit Week at school (our homecoming sport is basketball and our homecoming game is this Friday night).  We have "fun" days throughout Spirit Week and today was twin day.

I work in a predominately African American community.  That makes Twin Day fun for me.  (And I mean that sincerely, with no snarkiness intended.)  My "twin" for today is a friend of mine.  She and I decided to wear our Cowboys paraphernalia.  Follow me here....I am Caucasian.  She is African American.  Today...we were twins.  Now.......in the mind of a fourth grade student, twins should look the SAME.

Are you with me?

On Friday, as we were wrapping up the day and discussing the fun days that we would be enjoying this week,  several of my students asked me who my twin was.  They all were guessing it was either the third grade teacher or the other fourth grade teacher.  I blew their sweet little minds when I told them who my twin was.

You know that look you get from someone when you tell them something and they are working hard to process it?  Yeah.  That's the look I got.

Then one brave little soul raised their hand and said..."Miss Olsen.  Um.  You don't look ANYTHING at all like Miss XXXXX."

Um....YOU THINK?!?!

It was all I could do not to fall out laughing.

They are so funny.  And naive.  And mostly funny.

Tomorrow is my favorite of all the days....

PAJAMA DAY!!!!!!!

I get to wear my PJs to school and I can't wait!!!!  I promise to take pictures tomorrow if you will promise not to be disgusted by the amount of weight I have gained.  I am disgusted enough for the both of us.  I promise.

Night!

Saturday, January 14, 2012

This was supposed to be a productive day for me.

Alas.

It.Was.Not.

Unless, of course, you consider sitting on the couch, playing games on Facebook, and generally cursing all MANkind productive.

Which I am guessing you do not.

I have a confession to make and please don't judge me....

My Christmas tree is still up.


See...I was planning on taking it down today and then I didn't because I was cursing all MANkind.  You know what I mean.


I have had no real energy today and that pretty much sucks.  I did do several loads of laundry though, so that should count for something.  Oh!  And I changed the sheets on my bed.  Just in case you were wondering...by change I mean I took the sheets off, washed them, and put them right back on.

Does anyone else HATE trying to fold a fitted sheet?!?

So the tree-taking-down has been postponed until tomorrow.  In between football games.

Speaking of football, which we were, I am currently watching the Saints get kicked to the curb by the 49ers.  This doesn't make me happy because I don't like the 9ers.  Not that I truly love the Saints but I do consider them to be the lesser of two evils.

I am hoping to watch the Broncos beat the Patriots this evening but I am not holding my breath.  I am on the Tim Tebow bandwagon and all but I don't think they have a snowball's chance in H-E-double hockey sticks to beat the Patriots IN New England.  Sadly.  Because I REALLY don't like the Patriots.

Now on to the good stuff...

I came home yesterday and found a box waiting for me.  My Christmas present from my BFF had arrived!  With much anticipation I unlocked the door, dressed miss raven in her sweater and let her out, and dived in to opening the box.

I was NOT disappointed!  Look at my AWESOME present from my even more AWESOME BFF!!!!
 New ornament for my (still standing) tree.  Even though she hates football.

 She made me this awesome cowl!  It is a gorgeous pink and so warm and snuggly!

 Smelling these candles made me think of the beach.

 Only a true BFF would crochet me a football.  :)

 CA-ute little bag that also makes me think of the beach.

 This picture doesn't do this jewelry justice.  The colors are amazing and I am in LOVE with the necklace.

 My BFF is so uber-talented!  She also made me this necklace and earrings, and....

 ...this bag (made out of duct tape.  Who knew?)

 Metallic pink make-up bag...

...full of all kinds of goodies!

I love, love, love it all!  She completely outdid herself and has slightly changed my mind about duct tape.  ;)  Isn't she awesome!  I have the best BFF in the whole world!  She also sent me a bag of dark chocolate covered espresso beans...of which I have had a few many.

Update:  the Saints scored a touchdown and a two point conversion.  The 9ers trail by three but have the ball on the Saints 13 yard line with 14 seconds left.  Not that you care.  Well, crap.  They just scored a touchdown.  Only nine seconds left.  The Saints are on their way home.


Anywho.

I think it might time for some more coffee.

Goodnight!

:)



Tuesday, January 10, 2012

It's Electric....

I know that, by now, you must be getting tired of me saying this but,

I love my class.

Yes, they drive me crazy.  Especially around 2:53 when I can't wait for 3:40 to come around.

Yes, they ask me a gobzillion questions a day.

Yes, they frustrate me when I have to say something again.  For the gobzillionth time.

Yes, I love them.

They are funny, sweet, caring, kind, sensitive little souls.  They act without thinking, they sometimes speak without asking.  They would be thrilled to never have to leave the classroom at lunch time and spend the whole of lunch with me.  They freak if I'm not there and panic if I don't pick them up on time from music.

Speaking of music.  Today, when I went to pick them up from music class, I found that the teacher had let them finish class by doing the Cha-cha slide and the Cupid shuffle.  I half-jokingly told the teacher that I wish I would have known because I would have come up early and joined in.  That was all my angels needed to hear.  They begged and pleaded with the music teacher to play the Cha-cha slide again so that I could do it with them.  I couldn't back out so Cha-cha I did.  And then I made them do the Electric Slide.

hehehehe

I'm still sore.

Oy vey.

I can't wait to see what tomorrow brings.

I love my class.

Sunday, January 8, 2012

Bully...

This whole weather thing is odd.  I swear that winter so far, has a split personality.  Early last week it was frigid. The last three days...like spring.  Amazing!

And, may I also add...

NOT FAIR!

Seriously!

It's like a tease.  Winter is such a bully.  Freezing cold for a few days and then just a touch of warmth.  All of us summer-lovers get seduced into thinking that maybe spring is going to come early.  Then, out of nowhere, BAM!  Winter comes back and in a harsh and mean way.

It's not fair, I tell you.

Thursday, January 5, 2012

Short weeks always...

seem longer than regular weeks.

All day long it felt like today should be Friday.  I was so bummed that it wasn't.

Tomorrow is Friday, though, and I am ready for it.  Not that my kids are being naughty...much.  They were kinda trying my very last nerve today, though, and by 3:40 I was MORE than ready to see them leave for the day.

I realized last night that, duh, I have to do lesson plans for next week.  That was a big downer!  I was rather enjoying the two weeks of not having to do them.

BFF!!  You are back!  That makes my heart sing!  I missed your comments on my blog.  :)  Now...when are you coming to visit me??

;)

See...this is what happens when I blog every night.  My normal pointless drivel gets even more pointless.

I really, really don't have anything else to say.

Goodnight!

:)

Wednesday, January 4, 2012

I feel like I may be spoiling you...

what with all this blogging and all.

;)

Awwwww....thanks for the comment love yesterday.  Except for you, Matthew.  (psst...don't worry, he's my brother so I can say that.  It's all good.)

Seriously, though.  I've said it before but it bears repeating.  It is always nice to know that there are actually people out there reading my drivel.

I had a thought today.  Well, more than one actually, but probably only one you would be interested in.  I thought today that, when we are going through a bad time it seems to last forever.  When you come out on the other side of it, though, it doesn't (always) seem like it lasted that long.

Case in point (because you had to know there was going to be one, right?):

The last two years at work were literally hell for me.  From an egotistical, narcissistic head of school, to a "team" of individuals consisting of egotistical, arrogant, power-tripping, power-hungry people...yeah, work was hell.  I pretty much spent the last two years frantically worried that I was going to get fired, trying to placate demanding parents, trying to lead sometimes lazy individuals (not all of them, by any means), and trying to educate spoiled, over-indulged, children with an enormous sense of entitlement.  During those two years I lost sleep, gained weight, and had to visit a cardiologist.  It didn't seem like it was ever going to end.

Tonight I was thinking of how long ago those two awful years seem.  I actually am in love with my job again.  I mean it.  I LOVE my job.  I love my students.  They make me laugh every single day.  I feel like I am doing some good again and that I am making a difference again.

The funny thing is....some of those same parents who berated me, yelled at me, tried to get me fired, sneered at me in the hallway, argued with me, etc...those parents are now the ones who come to me and tell me how much they miss me.  I am always tempted to look around for the candid cameras because I feel like it must be a big joke.  I want to laugh in their faces and sometimes just barely catch myself and remind myself just how rude that would be.  So I do it in my mind.  That way I get the same pleasure without being rude.

Win-win.

One final thing.

Curse you Matthew for getting me hooked on Storage Wars.

Yuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuup!

;)

Tuesday, January 3, 2012

First day back...

Did I tell you about the first day back after Thanksgiving vacation?

I can't remember.

That's one of the downsides of being almost thirty-ten.

If I did tell you, please pretend like you don't remember because I am about to tell you again.

Don't worry.  There is a point to all of this.

I promise.

The first day back from Thanksgiving was interesting because we ended up out of the classroom for the first two hours or so.  A bomb threat will do that in a school.  No worries.  Apparently it was a prank.

Between you and me I hope they catch the little imp that did it and prosecute to the fullest extent.

Anywho.  On to the point.

Today was the first day back from Christmas vacation.  Aaannnndddd we were out of the classroom for the first two hours or so.

No bomb threat this time, though.  Just no heat in the building.  Not good seeing as how the outside temperature, with the wind chill factored in, was about 22 degrees.

I no likely the cold.

As if you didn't know!  :op

So both fourth grades spent the morning in the music room.

It was quite interesting.  We got up to the music room, got settled and went to PE!!!  Yea for PE!  Came back from PE and had an hour before lunch.  We did math games and a math lesson and then a quick spelling lesson.  We were all set to go to lunch when the principal (NOT ME!!!!!) came and told us that we couldn't eat in the lunch room (the gym) but we were allowed to go back to the classrooms and could eat lunch there.

So, all-in-all, not a bad day, just an interesting one.

I got another present today, too.  One of my kids forgot to give me a card before break.  She brought it to me today and it had a Starbucks gift card inside!  SCORE!

Oh, I got another present.....Speshul Snowflake is no longer my student!  Apparently she will be giving some other teacher grief about her many absences.  We'll see what happens, though, because Mommy told me that she might bring her back if the new school doesn't work out.  Hmmmm.....I wonder how much I can pay the new teacher to make it work out?

;)

Three days in a row, now.  BFF, are you happy?  I wouldn't know because you don't comment anymore.  :(  Actually, no one comments anymore.

Sigh.

Methinks I will go drown my sorrows in coffee, facebook, and yummy squishy yarn.

Goodnight!

Monday, January 2, 2012

Already?.....

It's already January 2?!?!  Sheesh!  Where is this year going??

;)

So, today, my last day of vacation, has proved to be quite boring.  I ended up doing nothing except drinking coffee and crocheting.  Not that I am complaining mind you.  Relaxing is a good thing.  Especially when drinking coffee, crocheting, watching a Murder, She Wrote marathon, and snuggling with a very sleepy Chihuahua.  Girlfriend is going to be in for a big shock tomorrow when she is alone all day.

um.  wait.

On second thought, I think that is exactly what she is waiting for!

I did do a little school work today.  I finished my lesson plans yesterday (nothing like waiting until the last minute, right?) and caught up on ALL my grading!  Now all I have to do is enter all the grades in to the computer tomorrow and I will be completely caught up.  For the moment.

Hey--don't get used to this blogging every day thing.  You know how reliable I am with that!

:op

It occurred to me that I neglected to tell you all about my Christmas gifts from my students.  Shame on me.  Here is a list of my bounty:  3 Starbucks gift cards, 2 Dunkin Donuts gift cards, 2 Michael's gift cards, 1 Target gift card, 1 Amazon gift card, 1 Cheesecake Factory gift card, much lotion/body wash, a box of chocolates, a sweater, a rockin' Cowboys blankie and scarf, a White House ornament for the tree, a bag of pecans, a pair of Christmas socks, a bouquet of flowers, pearl earrings, and cash.

Not bad.  ;)

Ok.  So my football season is pretty much over.  The Cowboys sucked better than a Dyson last night and, as a (painful) result, will NOT be headed to the playoffs this year.

Yeah.  I'm bummed.

Now I have to figure out who I am going to root for.  My money is on the Packers.  We'll see.

At least it won't be the redskins.  Or the eagles.

HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!

;)

Time for more crocheting and more coffee.  My dang feet are so cold.  I keep hoping that, if I drink enough coffee, my heat will warm up.  So far it isn't working.

Sigh.

I hate winter.

:ox

Sunday, January 1, 2012

Where did the time go...

Happy 2012, y'all!

Could someone please explain to me just exactly what happened to 2011?  Because the last time I looked, it was only like, June.

So.  What did you do on your Christmas break?  Wanna know what I did on mine?

Of course you do!

I had a WONDERFUL break.  I really did.  I got to do some amazing things and spend time with my amazing family.

I started off by taking a few trips into the city.  I went and saw Jersey Boys and LOVED it.  (disclaimer:  the actors use AUTHENTIC Jersey language.  And I do mean AUTHENTIC)  I love going to the theater anyway and this musical was well worth seeing.  The fact that the average age of the audience was about 50 made me feel younger, too.  Win-win.

I also went to the Botanical Gardens.  This was also amazing but for a different reason.  Instead of trying to explain, I will give you pictures:




















One of the best parts of my vacation was this:

YES, I WENT TO A COWBOYS GAME!!!!  IN DALLAS!!!!  AT MY FOOTBALL HEAVEN!!!!

My Christmas present from my Dad was a Dallas football game.  I wish I could say that they had a stellar game and played amazingly well and defeated their arch-enemy the eagles, but, alas.  I can't.  Instead, I can give you more pictures!







Christmas Day we flew back to El Paso and I spent the next three days with my brother and his family.  (cue more pictures):










I arrived back to my home a few days ago and am now just enjoying some down time before heading back to work on Tuesday.  I miss my kids and am looking forward to seeing them and hearing all about their Christmas vacation.

And now it is time to gird my loins and pray that the Cowboys can pull off a miracle to get into the playoffs.

:)